Grace that bears

"Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love."

Ephesians 4:2

Three years ago, on Mother's day, we made plans to go to lunch with my family after church. That morning rolled around and the alarms rang out. I turned towards Ryan and it was clear he wasn't going to be joining us. It was chemo week. My expectations for the day had to adjust.

Me and the boys got ready and left for church. Despite getting used to being alone at church for over 4 years, I remember that day I felt especially insecure. The void grew once we arrived. My parents sat down in the same pew as me, but on the opposite end. I started to ache and cramp up. In a building packed with people, I felt alone. Before child dedication, all moms were asked to stand in service. My emotions boiled at the surface. Apprehensions and all, I stood. As the sermon came to a close, we took communion. No coincidence there. I prayed that the Lord would deepen the roots of my swaying heart. I asked that He would steady me. I asked that He would fulfill me in that drought. He did exactly that.

While my dad served communion, my mom made the kind gesture to sit next to me the very moment I began praying. The empty seat next to me was filled. I wasn't alone anymore. As we left for lunch, I checked my phone. I had seven encouraging messages from friends and family that told me what I desperately needed to hear. Dear friends, who were also suffering greatly, stepped out of their own convenience and joined us for lunch. After our meal, the boys impishly told me "Happy Mommy Day" as I buckled them into their car seats. I left full.

"A perspective of gratitude builds our contentment with what God has provided." Melissa Michaels

The Lord gave me a victory. By His saving power, resentment and bitterness didn't seize the day. By His saving power, I refused to count the ways my husband didn't measure up. I set Ryan free from being bound to my report card, grieved his illness, and joyfully celebrated in the gifts that other young moms were given.

With the void of the one I hoped for, God provided ELEVEN others to stand in the gap. Yes, I counted. He covered me. God gave me a victory because those eleven stepped outside themselves and bore it with me. There was no condition. They just gave their time, presence, and love. That was my gift.

That personal experience reminds me that I have the power to choose one thought over the other. God is not in the business of plucking me out of hard circumstances. God is in the business of changing my heart.

"We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ."

2 Corinthians 10:5

"Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn. Live in harmony with one another..."

Romans 12:15-16

God was teaching me to take my thoughts captive so that I could see His blessings. I cannot embrace fleeting insecurities over unchanging truth. Projecting my personal issues onto others is the definition of alienation. When I lose sight of my identity in Christ, that is Satan's back door to my heart. I had to set myself aside so I could simultaneously and wholly rejoice with those who were rejoicing and mourn with those who were mourning.

The verses above tell us that our differences are supposed to unite us because, when we embrace the transforming work being done in someone else, we also embrace a transforming work in ourselves. By doing so, we become more of the person God wants us to be, not less. We must invite the Lord to intercede; helping and disciplining us to evaluate what enters our minds. When circumstances don't cater to us, then the microscope needs to be turned inward. What really needs to change? What are some ways we can leave the door open for God to work in our thoughts and attitudes? How could that help us recognize and point to His goodness more clearly?

Copyright 2018 ->Renee Sunberg